unexpecting

So I was g-chatting with my friend Nico today and he says he's about to take his ex's kids to this puppy adoption event at this pet supply store near my house. He asks if I want to come and get some puppy therapy and play with them. I say sure, sounds great. I was feeling a little down after speaking with a good friend of mine this morning whose father just passed from brain cancer this week. He is blessed with an amazing family and has been best friends with his parents his entire life, and I spoke with him right after he had gotten home from the services and friends and family were still gathered at his house. We had a good conversation and he just told me how much he loved his dad and how he was relieved he wasn't suffering anymore and just the thought of loosing a parent when you've never experienced that before is so overwhelming, I was feeling, well not down necessarily, but definitely emotional. So puppy therapy sounded like a good idea.

I walked over to the park next to the bakery near my house and Nico and the girls scooped me up and we went to this great little pet shop I'd never even noticed in my hood before. On the way, I learned that the younger of the two girls has been accepted into the school I work at for next year and was really excited about attending, so that was cool. I told her what a cool place it was and how the teachers were really young and fun and nice, and I think I may have mentioned that it has pretty much the best after school program EVER. I also told the girls they had to watch out for me when we get there because I might just go puppy crazy and leave with a dog. I was kidding of course, though I have been talking about wanting a dog since I moved to Oakland, I was still unsure about wanting the responsibility or extra financial stretch.

We parked in front of Lisa's Passion for Pets, climbed out of the car and wandered inside this tiny little hole in the wall of a pet store. As soon as I walked in, I was faced with a mirror holding onto a pillar in the middle of the store looking directly at me as I moved, and in that mirror, I was faced with the reflection of thighs spread wide, a run in a panty hose that I followed all the way up a thick leg till I had to look away for fear of seeing a woman's vagina who I didn't know and whose face I was going to have to behold in a matter of moments. Legs splayed upon a metal, folding chair and stretching a polyester patterned sunday skirt so tight it was forced to slip higher and higher up those thighs just to relieve the tension and remain in one piece. I turned my head quickly to the other side of the store and saw about 7 or 8 tiny dogs in a play pen. As me and Nico and the girls came through, all the dogs perked up and started making their case for adoption. As soon as my eyes focused, I found myself in a dead-on eye lock with this tiny little adorable chocolatey puppy. We stared at each other for a few seconds and then I walked over and reached into the pen to pet her. She started crying immediately. She cried and cried, like a baby. I tried to shhh her but the more I petted her, and then the girls started petting her, she just cried even more. We took her out and played with her for a long time. We played with most of the other dogs too, but me and this little one, they called her Madeline, we just had this connection. She was 2 1/2 months old and was being taken care of presently by a foster mom who held her all day and so she was having lots of separation anxiety. I felt like I understood her. Silly, I know, but that's the same age I was adopted from my foster mom and I know a thing or two about separation anxiety. She seemed so smart and that she had something really special in her, and I kept thinking, all that little girl needs is a stable home and someone who will love her and never leave her, and I bet she will be the fiercest thing you've ever seen.

I kept trying to talk my self out of it, asking Nico to talk me out of it, but I just couldn't think of any reason to not take her home that was better than all the reasons i could see for loving her. I asked Lisa, the store owner, if i could fill out an adoption form. Nico and the girls had brought along Nico's dog, Morcio, and he was getting antsy, so I asked him to drive me home and told Lisa I'd get my checkbook and drive back in my own car in a few minutes.

When I got back, Lisa showed me all of Madeline's paperwork. She had been taken by her owner to a pound and was given 4 days to be adopted. Her 4 days ran out and she was about to be euthanized when the California Underdog Rescue and Education saved her. Lisa told me that she was really lucky cuz alot of the time, they kill black dogs at the pound without even giving them the 4 days to get adopted. Racism is that deep that they kill black dogs first at the pound?? Jesus christ. Anyways, turns out Madeline is a scorpio, born 3 days before me on Halloween! So we were pretty much meant to be. She also told me that she's only been called Madeline for about a week now and didn't respond to it yet, so it would be perfectly fine for me to change her name. I had mixed feeling about this since I have mixed feelings about the fact that my name was changed multiple times throughout my adoption and I've always said, 'wow, who does that? people don't even change dogs' names when they adopt them, much less a baby's.'

So I signed all the paperwork, bought her food and bowls and toys and a leash even tho she doesn't walk on one yet. Lisa was kind enough to let me borrow a crate for a week till I get paid and can get one myself. And then me and Madeline walked out the door...well I walked, she was carried....got in my car and drove off into the almost sunset together.

She's been at home now for about 6 hours and has already warmed up to her new environment. She has shown herself to be smart and loving and cuddley and adorable and freaking fierce and totally playful and sweet. I just keep calling her babygirl for now, but I plan on thinking of a name for her in the next few days. It will be something smart and fierce and loving. She's already a total mama's girl and we stare into each other's eyes alot.

We're in love...